dear sarah jessica parker,

the newspaper it said,
it said that sarah jessica parker
has been voted
the least sexiest woman alive.
actually it said
"unsexiest woman"
which goes without saying
is stupid.
now what i want to know is
what the people
(what the men)
over at maxim look like
and can they please send their photographs
over to the rest of the world
so we can judge how wrinkled
their cheeks are and how bulging
their bellies hang over
the tops of their pants and
everything else that is
ugly about them. and then
we can all post their pictures
in newspapers and discuss their flaws
and assign them each a number,
like "number one unsexiest moron"
or "number one fat idiot"
or "just plain mean."
because who the fuck has the time
they already judge who is sexy
and its already destructive.
and sarah, she's sexy
and she shouldn't have to say
"i don't think i am, either"
she shouldn't have to say that.